It has been a while since I posted a clip of myself singing on the blog. There were many reasons why:
When one tries to build something up, there are many who want to tear it down. The more I got a following, the more I became prone to attack by those who would seek to ridicule my attempt at what some have thought impossible or even stupid. My gradual retraining from “false baritone” to “true tenor” has not been easy. I took the rather courageous (or foolhardy) path of sharing the process from its clumsy beginning through not so beautiful midpoint to what I would now call “a more coordinated phase.”
I did not want to post something here until I had something that I considered really high quality. However, some read this blog and access old files that have not sounded anywhere near refined but chose to judge those files as if they were what I considered a final product. In the end, whether I abstain from posting clips or post them, it matters little to those who seek to see the worst in everything they don’t understand or find different.
The other reason is that I have been extremely busy developing an international studio, an enterprise that requires every ounce of energy I have available, particularly at times when I fly 13 planes in 15 days.
In the process of retraining as a tenor, I realized that my voice had not really been trained at all! My teachers did their best in helping me to understand vocal coordination, assuming that the vocal substance I displayed was all I had. If there is anything different in what I teach, it is this simple axiom:
“We are not always what we think we are! And I am not talking about vocal categorization!”
Most singers do not begin their conscious training with a knowledge of what their true vocal color is. Most of us in fact have not developed the laryngeal structure enough to really have a sense of our true vocal color. Culture, physical robustness, early exposure to operatic singing, etc…have a profound influence on how we relate to our voices. And those who developed strong vocal attributes in their “pre-conscious” years (those we call natural talents) often have no idea what it takes to develop a voice because they take for granted that you have a voice worthy of singing or you do not.
Contrary to popular opinion, I have not yet encountered a healthy voice that could not be trained to cut through an operatic orchestra. Whether or not someone has the resilience, determination, passion and persistence to get there is an entirely different question. I witness minor vocal miracles on a daily basis from those that began with little and achieved a little more. I rejoice in the little steps because they are the lasting ones.
This retraining to assume my natural tenor voice has been/is my personal Mount Everest. I will continue to ignore the nay-sayers and keep climbing “one little step at a time” until I can enjoy the great pleasure of making music with my voice the way I always imagined possible. In the mean time, here is just another point in the journey!